The days when you could break-up and never have to see your Ex’s face again are over. Thanks to the variety of popular social media outlets such as Facebook(don't be lulled by the new tool), Instagram, and Twitter, avoiding the person with whom you have just split has become a full-time job. Just as you are trying to get over your Ex and move on, their posts and images seem to follow you wherever you go.

Are daily reminders of your Ex sending you into a panic? Feel like you’ve been punched in the gut when you come across a photo of your Ex with an unknown? Perhaps completely unplugging from all social media sounds like an unreasonable request, as you have every right to stay connected with your friends and supports during this difficult time. But what you can do is some cleaning-uip of your social media accounts. And what better time for a good, deep cleaning than this spring?!

Here are the steps you should take to clean-up your social media accounts and move on from your Ex:

#1 Come to terms with the fact that you have an issue. There are some telltale signs that your social media accounts are in serious need of cleansing. When you create a post, are you always thinking in the back of your mind how it would appear to your Ex? Have you ever passive-aggressively ‘liked’ or commented on a post of your Ex just to remind them that you exist? Have you ever posted something that is intended to trigger a fond memory to your Ex or to ‘show off’ how remarkably well you are doing now? Do you find yourself checking to the ‘green dot’ to see if you Ex is online? Or are you fighting the compulsion to refresh his/her page to see the latest updates and newly added friends and followers? All of these examples illustrate that your social media behavior is being controlled by your Ex in the back of your mind, preventing you from being your full self. It’s time to take the control back in to your own hands and to start rebuilding your confidence to move on in the virtual world.

#2 Prepare to do something about it. Now that you have acknowledged that being connected with your Ex on social media is a problem for you, it’s time to take steps to remedy the situation. One of the most difficult things to do is to admit to yourself that you have been avoiding this step because a part of you is holding onto the hope that you may one day reunite with your Ex if you remain virtually linked. But due to the addictive power of the relationship, you always will feel worse after cyberstalking an Ex. When we give into our powerful compulsions to seek information or contact, we experience a biological rush – a surge of endorphins – that is only temporary. Shortly afterwards we become left with a hangover of anxiety, pain, and grief. Repeatedly riding this emotional rollercoaster is what wears you down psychologically and takes a toll on your physical health, not the actual grieving process. If it helps, make a list of the pros and cons for changing as a reference and motivator for when you begin your cleaning. Remember that every glimmer of reconnection can blur the rational reasons to why the relationship ended. Every hour spent scrutinizing an Ex online is an hour spent not searching for a better match. Maintained connections can challenge new relationships as well. It’s impossible to step into a new relationship when one foot is stuck in the past. Once you are past the contemplation stage of change, it’s time to take action!

#3 Clean-up begins. Your first step should be to ‘unfriend’ or ‘unfollow’ your Ex. Some people may argue that keeping those connections to your Ex makes you appear strong-willed and prevents drama. I would have to argue the complete opposite. For many, it takes more strength to make the conscious choice to delete and move on. Unlike just ‘blocking from newsfeed’, deleting the contact and disconnecting from your Ex’s profile makes a bold statement. It announces to your Ex and to others that you are moving forward in your life, independently of the other person. There’s also a commitment to the choice of ‘unfriending’ that shows that this time you are never going back. Ever. Cleaning up your social media concludes a decisive ending to the relationship on your terms. There will be no confusion on your Ex’s part as to why the disconnection was made and there is no explanation needed.

#4 Clean-up the remaining clutter. This step is a bit more tedious, but entirely necessary to the process. Now that the disconnection from your Ex has been established, it’s time to clean-up your own pages. This includes removing any posts about the break-up itself. Delete and untag photos and albums of you with your Ex. Your profile may appear stark, but this is only temporary as over time you will create even greater memories. Take down all of the photos as you physically would take down framed photos in your own home. Where to draw the line with your Ex’s friends and family? Delete any friends or family members that you did not have a relationship with prior to dating your Ex. If there are still some remaining mutual connections with your Ex, it may be best to ‘block’ their news feed while you are in the early stages of recovery, removing any temptation to cyberstalk.

#5 Take a breath and reflect. Congratulations! You have taken some significant steps towards removing stress and moving forward with your life! Inform your friends and family about the important steps you have taken and remind them that you may need their support. The busier you stay during your time offline, the more the cyber temptations will weaken and eventually disappear. When you are online, stay connected with the Exaholics community and other supportive networks that generate health and healing. The actions you have just taken have not only cleansed your virtual space, but they have also detoxified your mental space.

Dr. Jacqueline Duke is a contributing expert to EXaholics.com