Dreading Valentine's Day writes:

This will be my third Valentines without him and I’m still dreading it. The first was only a couple of months after the breakup so the pain was still very raw, but I was still in his thoughts. He sent me a text wishing me well and expressed regret that things didn't work out as we had hoped. Things cooled off in year two, though we still communicated. This year we are not on speaking terms at all. I know he’ll be doting over another love and pouring his affection while I hurt with this vision in mind. This year the sound of a text coming through from him will be noticeably absent. I'll have to process the deafening silence.

I’m so very tired of this. I don’t understand why some of us have to suffer this pain for so incredibly long. I’m exhausted and frustrated and just want to feel happy again. I’m just going to try and stay busy that day. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

EXaholics.com says:

Dear Valentine's Day Blues, your expression of hurt hits home with so many of us. How does what would normally be an ordinary day carry so much emotion and unbridled sadness because of a label? Just because we gave this day a name and date, suddenly everything changes and we are destined to suffer such deprivation?

The reality is that we give days, dates, and other marked points a certain power. It's our own doing that we've loaded a single calendar day with so much expectation of love and outpouring of affection. Are we so dreadfully bankrupt of affection for one another all year that we have to designate a day to make up for the remaining 364-day drought. The thought is a bit preposterous, isn't it?

We at EXaholics believe that human affection, love, touch and devotion is a 365-day a year proposition. And the question is, who has what it takes to live up to the task? Do we want someone who's good at coming through one day in February. Or do we want something so much more valuable and powerful--true love, expressed fully all year round?

And then the logical question rises to the surface? Is that what the EX offered? If the answer is no, then you might see Valentine's Day for what it really proves. That haphazard lovers come out in force on Valentines Day. That's the perfect time for the phone not to ring.

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